[San Francisco] Mayor Gavin Newsom apologized Thursday for having a sexual relationship with his former campaign manager's wife. "I'm deeply sorry," Newsom said during a brief news conference at City Hall the day after the aide resigned.
Look, sometimes you just gotta have a little nookie. And when you're as busy as the mayor of a major metropolitan city, then you don't have time to go trolling for skanky hos on the street. Just walk ten paces to the next office for some clean poon.
As for me, I work from home, so there is no poon to be had within the confines of my apartment. By default, I am required to go trolling for skanky hos on the street.
Gavin Newsom is a lucky man.
—Reporting From Glendale, California