Long before Diablo Cody, Juno screenwriter and my compatriot in boy band husbandry, won an Oscar, I asked her if I could touch it if she won. She said yes. Then I specified that I wanted to not only touch it but to also stick it in me. She did not protest.
She's probably forgotten that text exchange, but I am posting this to remind her that I am currently in the process of choosing which orifice.
By the way, CONGRATULATIONS!