The first movie starring Colin Farrell in a leading role that I ever saw was the Colin Farrell Sex Tape, which was readily available online a couple years back. (Yes, you can Google it, pervs!) (Oh, okay, fine, last time I checked, it's here.) Needless to say, I justifiably became an instant fan. I mean, c'mon, when he goes down on that woman and exclaims, "Breakfast, lunch, and motherfucking dinner right here!," it made my vagina feel things it had never felt before.
I never did end up digging though Farrell's back catalog of movies, though. Perhaps I was wary of the prospect of seeing a Colin Farrell movie that didn't feature his penis as a supporting character.
What a revelation Farrell was, then, in Woody Allen's Cassandra's Dream. Released earlier this year, it's a film that even this Woody Allen fan and staunch apologist thought was boring—but Farrell's piercing performance was something you just could not take your eyes off of. His character bubbled with desperation, guilt, and pathos—his core of common human decency consumed in a tragedy of epic proportions. (A rich uncle recruits two brothers to commit murder, and one is up for the task [Ewan McGregor], while the other [Farrell] is plagued by doubt.)
Farrell impresses once again as a hitman with a conscience in the entertaining (and unapologetically crass) In Bruges, a film by playwright Martin McDonagh. Farrell knows how to deliver a line and let it go as if he didn't know how goddamn funny he is. No, the movie doesn't quite reach the level of profundity that you may desire out of a Martin McDonagh work, but profundity is way overrated. I'd rather laugh and be done with it:
Okay, any other good Colin Farrell movies that I should see? And when you name a movie, please include information on how naked Farrell gets in it (e.g., "takes his shirt off twice," "shows his butt crack," etc.). That will help me prioritize. (As for In Bruges, he wears his shirt unbuttoned in one scene, exposing his chest and stomach [*swoon*].... Now tell me how much you appreciate the things I write about for your edification.)