Expressing a Little Bit of Man Love for Drell (AKA Drake Bell)

I, of course, actively avoided Epic Movie, Date Movie, Meet the Spartans, and all those other lame-looking film parodies made for six-year-olds—but I just could not resist the pull of Superhero Movie. Why? Well, the film features Drake Bell, a Nickelodeon star who moonlights as an extremely talented musician who's like a throwback to the heyday of sunny 60s pop. Drake's songs make me happy because they're way catchy (as evidenced by his terrific sophomore effort, It's Only Time) and he is prone to singing thinly veiled odes to anal sex. The album's lead track, "Up Periscope," for example, boasts sweetly metaphorical lyrics such as this:

Whoever said romance was over
Roll over
So I can show you
Don't you want me to be the captain of your submarine
Up periscope
That's what I say
That's just my way
Of saying that I love you (I do)

Yup. When you're done pounding her from the front, roll her over for some backdoor action!

By no stretch of the imagination is Superhero Movie worth your money, but I didn't mind it because I didn't mind staring longingly at Drake Bell for an hour and a half. I mean, sure, he's adorable and all, but he's also rather charming and goofy. Enough to make the 13-year-old girl in me swoon despite the fact that what was happening on screen should've made me flee the theater. (I admittedly chuckled a few times, though.)

At the very least, the movie did remind me to listen to Drake's music today, something which I haven't done in a while. You can't resist this man. You just can't:

[Addendum: Check out "The Official Drake Bell Post."]


  1. The best thing ever was right after Drake and Josh aired I fell in love with the theme song (let me note in 2004 my kids were 5 and 7)and talked about it in my blog, and when I looked at my stats found that tons of kids were finding me via "Drake and Josh theme song lyrics" innappropriate as my crush on Drake Bell.

  2. Just type the phrase "Zac Efron shirtless" and watch your stats skyrocket!