Help These Kids Because I Won't, Part 2

Last year, dear readers, I asked you to help a middle school buy theater books. And in a matter of hours you, as well as others in the blogosphere, fully funded the project because you had some extra money lying around from that crack deal you pulled off. Crime pays!

When those in charity circles say that no amount is too small to make a difference, people for some reason don't believe it and that measly dollar they would've given remains in their pocket so they can buy a Frosty later. Well, please hear me now when I say to you that NO AMOUNT IS TOO SMALL in my latest effort to help the children of America by getting you to help them first.

A low-low-low-low-low-income middle school in California needs money to buy some nonfiction books. All they're asking for is $979, which will make a significant impact on kids who should learn more about Martin Luther King Jr. and Stonewall and Stephen Hawking. (I'm amazing—I played the race card, the gay card, and the disability card all in one sentence!)

The project was launched by my good friend Robert (who teaches at said school), is (as of this writing) 40% funded, and could benefit from your kindness. Read the proposal and give easily on this web page. Let's get this mofo fully funded, so that we're not raising a nation full of idiots. Please, and thank you.

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