They Are Awesome (According to Them)

The first third of Weezer's new red album is Rivers Cuomo singing about how awesome Rivers Cuomo is. Look at some of the lyrics from "Troublemaker":

I'm such a mystery
As anyone can see
There isn't anybody else

Exactly quite like me

And when it's party time

Like 1999

I party by myself because

I'm such a special guy

Or "The Greatest Man That Ever Lived":

I'm the baddest of the bad
I'm the best that you've ever had
I'm the tops, I'm the king

All the girls get up when I sing, yeah

Or "Pork and Beans":

I ain't gonna wear the clothes that you like
I'm fine and dandy with the me inside

One look in the mirror and I'm tickled pink

I don't give a hoot about what you think

The reason why Rivers Cuomo can get away with it, and the reason why I absolutely revel in his odes to himself is because he's Rivers fucking Cuomo! He really is that awesome!

My favorite narcissist in the music industry, however, has to be British superstar Robbie Williams, whose first U.S. album was titled, appropriately enough, The Ego Has Landed.

One of my favorite songs by him is "Handsome Man," an absurdly vain ditty from Escapology (there's a prelude in this video, and the actual song starts about a minute in):

I honestly want to make that my theme song.

By the way, the shocking and vulgar music video for Robbie's "Rock DJ" is certainly one of my favorites—and it's subversively smart and layered, visually and metaphorically:

Isn't that sick?!


  1. I totally had the hots for Robbie back in the day. When he took off his pants in that video.....I died a little.

  2. It makes me want to craft you a sampler reading "cockiness is next to godliness" because these are traits we all need to embrace. (and encourage especially in the case of Rivers Cuomo, who is my favorite and what I want for my birthday)