[Welcome to Bamboo Nation's first-ever live-blogging event! If you are indeed joining me live on October 2, 2008, for the The Sarah Palin Comedy Show (with a special appearance by Joe Biden), scheduled for 6PM Pacific Time (9PM Eastern), then you can watch me post ongoing commentary in real time. All you have to do is refresh this page every few minutes to see new items posted below. If you have comments yourself along the way, feel free to write them in the comments section or e-mail me—maybe I'll post some of them below as they come in.]
5:17PM: I've logged on early because I'm giddy with excitement! I think I'm going to dress up for this, so let me go find some event-appropriate socks and shoes.
5:23PM: I just turned on the TV in the living room and tuned in to ABC, and I also turned on the radio in the kitchen (it can receive audio from TV channels). I don't want to miss a single thrilling moment!
5:33PM: They're showing clips of Joe Biden. You know, he's kind of a handsome old man. Not that I'd do him. I'm just saying. Ask the lesbians.
5:38PM: I am now wearing black socks and black Kenneth Cole shoes...and nothing else.... Just kidding, pervs!
5:44PM: By the way, Sarah Palin has never seen Russia from Alaska. Ask CNN.
5:46PM: By the way, the expression on Anderson Cooper's face after he played the Palin/Couric/Russia clip last week is great. He looks temporarily paralyzed with deep confusion and discomfort.
5:53PM: They just showed a new McCain-speaking-into-the-camera ad. I admire how he tries so hard to pretend he's not reading a cue card. Hey...why isn't there a voice-over at the end in which he says, "I'm John McCain, and I approve this message"?
6:00PM: I love that exciting theme music!
6:01PM: Diane Sawyer said the debate is "not for the faint of heart." Ha ha ha ha ha!
6:01PM: I don't know about the color of that jacket, Gwen.
6:03PM: Biden and Palin just took the stage. It looked like they were going to kiss!
6:05PM: Man, Biden is kind of boring, isn't he?
6:05PM: Did she just say, "Betcha?"
6:06PM: How about fear of YOU, Sarah?!
6:06PM: OMG, Sarah Palin has been replaced by a robot!
6:07PM: Jake is now here in my apartment. I think he's drinking alcohol--I assume to numb the pain.
6:08PM: OMG, Sarah Palin, stop staring into my soul!
6:09PM: Gwen, you go girl! (She said something about neither of them answering the questions she asked.)
6:10PM: Enough with the hockey moms! I'm going to puke!
6:10PM: Annie just e-mailed me referring to Palin asking Biden, "Can I call you Joe?" Annie writes: "She's winking, and she's totally red like a tomato!" Now that I'm looking for it, she does look a little sunburned, doesn't she?
6:12PM: She said, "Darn right!", AGAIN!
6:14PM: Paraphrasing Palin: "I'm not going to answer the questions the way you want." WHAT?!
6:16PM: Jake says, "Palin is a celebration of confident ignorance." Preach it, brother!
6:17PM: Palin, will you please stop smiling?! It's creeping me out!
6:18PM: Ashley left a comment about Palin's wink too. Do you think Palin and Biden had a little hanky panky in the dressing room?
6:20PM: Jakes exclaims, "OH GOD, SHE BOTHERS ME!"
6:22PM: Biden: "The ultimate bridge to nowhere." Ha ha ha ha ha!
6:26PM: Prince: "Jake, would you do Sarah Palin?" Jake: "Absolutely. Just to say I did." Prince: "Even I am horrified."
6:28PM: Prince: "Jake, would you do Sarah Palin twice?" Jake: "Depends on how good of a blowjob she gave."
6:30PM: Oh, just answer the fucking question, Palin!
6:31PM: "There are real changes in our climate." Ha ha ha ha ha!
6:34PM: "The chant is, 'Drill, baby, drill!'" Because it's important to correct Biden on that, Palin.
6:37PM: You know, Palin, I would like to see your "diverse" friends.
6:40PM: Re: Iraq exit strategy. Will you please answer the fucking question?!
6:42PM: See my question above. Again.
6:43PM: The beaming "what the fuck?" look on Biden's face: priceless!
6:45PM: Biden: "God love him, but he is dead wrong." Ha ha ha ha ha!
6:48PM: Answer the fucking question!
6:49PM: "Our respect for women's rights." WHAT THE FUCK?! Do you mean the right to choose, Palin? Oh...I guess not.
6:52PM: Quin commented, "Be nice. Her highlights are great!" Oddly enough, Jake just said something about Palin's scary hair: "It looks like Burning Man."
6:54PM: Paraphrasing Palin: "I'm glad we both love Israel! I love those damn Israelis as much as you do!"
6:57PM: No, Gwen, do not let her talk about Afghanistan! Make her answer the questions!
6:57PM: Jake: "I need more drinking for this." (Goes to kitchen.)
6:58PM: Say what you will about Palin, but she is expert at not answering the questions and spending valuable time talking about something else that is in the general ballpark of the question asked. Why won't Gwen reign her in?
7:02PM: Jason commented, "This actually isn't half bad. I mean, she's not flubbing everything (even if she likes to change the subject), and he's keeping himself relatively in control. Still, though, he's better at refuting stuff than she is." I think it's because our expectations of her were so so so so so low.
7:03PM: A friend just called me: "I want her to die."
7:06PM: Jake: (Sigh.)
7:08PM: He said, "Bush Doctorine!" Ha ha ha ha ha!
7:10PM: Prince: "Jake, okay, if she weren't a VP candidate, then would you do her?" Jake: "Absolutely not." Prince: "I respect you again." Jake: "Unless she paid me."
7:12PM: Don't wink at me, Palin! I'm going to sue you for sexual harassment!
7:13PM: If that was a joke...IT WASN'T FUNNY!
7:14PM: She's playing the special needs card!
7:16PM: Re: Her answer to the Dick Cheney question. This is the funniest show on television. Ever!
7:18PM: Hmm, Palin, do you support special needs children...? Oh, yeah, you do because you've told us 15 million times already!
7:20PM: I love how one of her qualifications for the vice presidency is "being a mom."
7:21PM: Biden almost cried! Yay!
7:24PM: Thank the lord it's almost over!
7:31PM: I'm sorry, but I just can't take her seriously. She just makes me laugh and laugh and laugh!
7:31PM: Lisa commented, "I like how she keeps mentioning rooting out greed and corruption.... Hey Sarah, how's it going with getting your ex-brother-in-law fired? Getting the variances overlooked so you can sell that house?" ....Maybe she can sell it on eBay.
7:36PM: Where is her hot future son-in-law?!
7:37PM: Prince: "Final thoughts, Jake?" Jake: "I hope change changes the hope."
7:40PM: Jake and I are now going to go see Eagle Eye to numb the pain. The horrific, terrible, gut-wrenching pain. Good night, and thank you.