Being Sick Is Inefficient

On the rare occasion that I get sick, I usually like to be left completely alone to wallow in my misery. But I came down with something so horrible on Friday—symptoms included nausea, stomach pains, body aches, loss of appetite, dehydration, extreme physical weakness—that my dear old mother made a house call with boxes full of Gatorade, orange juice, and yogurt she bought from Costco and Loren tried to force-feed me bananas, crackers, tea, and pills. (I am not your most cooperative patient—group me in with the nutjobs in One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest when I'm ill.) I spent most of this weekend writhing and moaning in some kind of pain.

LOREN: You haven't eaten anything in two days! You have to eat this banana! Eat it!

PRINCE: I hate bananas when I'm well! Why would I willingly eat it now?!

When I woke up this morning, I felt like somebody was punching me repeatedly in the stomach. While that pain has subsided, I still feel like an invisible hand has reached inside me and is squeezing my intestines.

How bad has it been? Until now, I haven't been on my computer since Friday afternoon! For someone with his laptop practically stitched into his clothing, that's really bad. (Bamboo Nation's weekend posts were pre-scheduled and posted automatically. So even though I was offline, I was still posting. Which, come to think of it, is kind of sick in itself.)

Remind me never to get ill again. Sometimes I forget.


  1. I'm sorry you're not well. Sounds like a wicked flu. Feel better...and I'm sorry to side with Loren, but eat the damn banana.

  2. Get well soon!

    Oh, and by the way, you were right. Don't eat the banana, they're disgusting .

  3. Anonymous1/04/2009

    Sorry to hear that you're sick Prince!

  4. Oh, my God! I feel so badly for you!

    Don't you think you should see a doctor? God, get Loren to drive you in if you feel bad tomorrow, you might need something to help you kill the damn thing making you ill.

    Just remember: My fortune teller says that if you ring in the new year not feeling well, if portends great success.

    Okay: I lied. But, it's a reassuring lie, isn't it? And it works for me, because I'm always sick at New Years.

    Listen to your Mom and drink so much gatorade you never want to see the stuff again.

    Poor you.

    BTW: Didn't you get the memo? You're not allowed to get sick! We need you too much.

  5. I hate to think of you ailing, but I love it that you had actually pre-posted your Bamboo Nation entries so we wouldn't have to do without. You're always thinking of others, that's your problem. You give and you give and you GIVE. Now it's time to rest up.

  6. If it persists, please see a doctor (he might be cute, after all) :)

    Wishing you good health now and always...

  7. please, Prince. Don't die.

  8. I hope you feel better soon!

  9. Sterling1/05/2009

    I was up all last night with the same my head feels like it's going to split and I know that I'm severely dehydrated, but I'm afraid to drink too much water or gatorade because I'll throw it up. I feel your pain!

  10. Novovirus? There's also a stomach flu/sick bug hitting the UK in Winter. I rang in New Year 2007/2008 that way. This year it was a HUGE gunpowder plot in Berlin. Get well soon though!

  11. Hope you feel better soon, Prince.


  12. loren was right... the brat diet (bananas, rice, applesauce and toast) works. your tummy won't heave it up and they digest quickly.

    hope you are better. if not, keep your germs to yourself.

  13. Loren demanding you to "eat his banana?" And all written without a trace of irony!
    Feel better soon!

  14. Thanks for the well wishes, everyone (even Mike, in his own special way). I'll have an update shortly. Sterling, don't keep yourself from throwing up! Your body is trying to purge! (If you have the stomach flu, let it flow!)

  15. many people seem to have the same bug you have......every wish for a speedy recovery!

  16. Awwww get better soon. Please.

    And eat that damn banana!

  17. Anonymous1/06/2009

    OH PRINCE!!! My updates must not be working. I had no idea you had fallen ill. You poor baby.

    Get well soon. Please eat Loren's banana. It will give you lots of potassium and things to replenish your innards.

    love jess