Who Is Flapjack?

As an unusually social cat, Pork Chop has been rather lonely for the past couple of months. You see, the other person who used to live in our apartment no longer lives in our apartment. (For those of you who know a bit about my personal life, that statement means everything that you think it means—and believe me, it's all been as unexpected and inexplicable to me as it is, I presume [?], to you.)

What I'm saying is, Pork Chop has asked for a sibling, a companion, a plaything that he can bat around like a chicken leg. After considering a bunch of different names—including top contenders like "Sha Siu Bao" and "Ham Sammy"—I've decided to name Pork Chop's probably-brother "Flapjack." The thing is, we have no idea who Flapjack is yet or where he (or she) is coming from.

The hunt began at the Glendale Humane Society, where the woman started grilling me in a slightly confrontational manner, as if I were some crazy person who was trolling animal shelters for cuts of meat for an Asian stew. Jesus Christ, if you're trying to deal with pet overpopulation and place strays in loving homes, you shouldn't act suspicious of someone like me, who loves his Pork Chop MORE THAN LIFE ITSELF.

The saga continues....

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  1. I know what you mean about crazy humane society workers - I had to fill out an adoption application form before I was even allowed to go in & see the kittens in my local SPCA. And they called TWO of the 3 references I had put down before I even got home!!!
    And I didn't even end up getting a kitten from them - but from another SPCA in a neighbouring town - where they "just knew" I would be a good owner!!! Very strange!!!

  2. Kim, yeah, I've decided to try other Humane Societies that hopefully won't give me such a hard time....

  3. you can take the cat at my apartment! my roommate got it over the summer without asking me, and it was supposed to be gone by the time i moved back in, but it's still here.

    he's a big grey and white cat, (he's only 17lbs though, so he's smaller than porkchop) and he's really nice. i'm sure you can change his name to flapjack. it's already been changed from steven to tardis.

  4. also, he was a pound cat, so it's almost like getting one from the SPCA...

    (i'm totally not joking here, prince. PLEASE take the cat.)

  5. Well, the Glendale Humane Society might be a little alarmed that you're naming the cats after delicious food...

  6. What a great duo they would make! You could call them team FlapChop! Or Team PorkJa...erm never mind, that sounds inappropriate...

    P.S. Bingo? You, Me & Marilyn? Yes? Sound as though fun times are needed.