Hot Actors

Somebody (I know who you are, Anonymous) in the comments section of my post about Career Opportunities wrote:
Attention Blockbuster Inc.

do not hire Prince Gomolvilas.
he steals. he will also try to hump the other actor/model employes. [sic] unless you think that might boost moralle. [sic]
What this is in reference to is this:

Many of the employees at my local Blockbuster are young struggling actors (hence, working at Blockbuster), who all happen to be hot. And they're not all hot in the same sort of plastic Hollywood sort of way. They're all different degrees and types of hotness. You know, how there's surfer hot or guy-next-door hot or Jew hot or nerd hot or ethnic-mix hot or porn-star hot, etc.? Well, most of them are at my Blockbuster on different days of the week.

I never really talk to any of them. (I typically acknowledge people's hotness by either ignoring them or being very curt with them; you see, if they know how hot I think they are, they will try to unceremoniously grab my ass—and I have boundaries, despite what you think.) But I overhear their conversations with each other—about their auditions for horror movies, about things they heard in celebrity interviews, and about how Blockbuster ain't so bad because they let you go on auditions whenever you need to.

Little do they know that the Asian dude who comes in and laments about their tendency to miscategorize movies (how, oh, how does Silent Hill end up in the Drama section?) has the power to change their entire lives right here and now by using this forum to post their headshots, thereby skyrocketing them to certain fame the next time some disgruntled movie director Googles himself and stumbles upon my blog.

Put When a Stranger Calls in the right section, and then we'll talk.

—Reporting From Glendale, California


  1. sometimes, i think they just throw them up in the air..

    or, maybe let mad german squirrels...

    ohhhhhhhh, look, hunky firemen outside my building. someone's set their apartment on fire. it happens on payday, when the crack is going good.

    gotta go.